weapons of rebellion

Today I was outside reading my scriptures when a certain verse struck me hard. Its in Alma where Aaron and his brothers are teaching the Lamanites the Gospel and its says this of the Lamanites conversion:

Alma 23:7
For they became a righteous people; they did lay down the weapons of their rebellion, that they did not fight against God anymore, neither against any of their brethren.

I wonder what kind of weapons they were laying down, I don't know about you but if I am "fighting against God" its not with a sword or gun, its with weapons named: selfish, stubborn, prideful, hard hearted.....these are my weapons, and after some time I usually am humbled By my my own mistakes and issues at those moments I realize I have be clutching with all my strength these useless weapons.

I can not think of an instance when being selfish is going to bring me or my family closer to God. SO I just was thinking. WHAT ARE my weapons of rebellion? I mean what am I clutching on to that is putting distance between me and God, me and my family and friends? What walls am I building, I know in my mind these things are some how protecting me, but only when I put them down and start to have trust, faith and love fill my heart, is when I will be happy and have peace and grow closer to those I love and God.

I think one of my weapons of rebellion is Fear, I am scared of being hurt, rejected, made fun of...maybe its insecurity- I don't know, BUT fear seems to stop me from being ME! it stops me from opening my mouth or reaching out...fear is a weapon. so now I have been honest with you..be honest with yourself...what are your weapons of rebellion, maybe its time to put them down.

hmmm....

Today I was driving in my car ( I have been doing that a lot this week!) and It struck me that If I was in advertising I for sure would have a bleak out look on the general population.....I heard ad after ad appealing to those of us who would like to "sit on our butts all the time", who never get enough "me time" those of us who just don't feel good about ourselves so we need to go out and buy things because...well didn't you know.... if you buy things for yourself you will instantly feel better? I just had to stop and think..when did it become o.k to be selfish and lazy and be willing to pay any amount of money to do so? its and interesting experiment to start listening to an ad and think about what they are really saying, the message they are encouraging...listen this week. see what you think. because I think all the messages that are being sent out are really hurting our image of ourselves. they are demoralizing and provocative...its sad really.

if we are being honest....

If I am going to be honest with myself then I would have to admit that I have not blogged in so long that I was not totally sure if I had the blog address right when I was typing it into my mothers computer........

If I HAVE to be honest with myself, I would admit that its be so long since I blogged that I dont even know what to write anymore.....

And if I am going to keep up with this honesty thing...... I would say that while I am excited to start sending the thoughts in my head and the happenings of our family out into the wonderful world of the internet, I can not promise I will be 100% committed to consistent blogging....I mean, right now I had to stop typing this little thought so I could pick soggy rice krispie cereal out of joeys hair and ears and eye brows......that pretty much sums it up. So I'm back blogging world...watch out!

Elder Russell M. Nelson is Coming to town!

This coming weekend elder Russell M. Nelson is coming to Yuba city for stake conference. The closer it gets, the more excited I get! You know, if a movie start were to walk in front of me...it might be cool, but in the end I ahave never gotten into that stuff to much because they are just really rich people who seem to have more problems then I would care for, BUT Elder Nelson is totally different. He is an Apostle of God. I mean, this man is Chosen by God to teach us what we need in these times. He is not just an person, he is a man of god.

So of course- since I am a goofy little lady- I have thought about what would happen if I ran into him around town or if he stopped by the house. ( at this moment feel free to laugh yourself off your chair.) In all my thinking it occurred to me that maybe I wouldn't want him to stop by my half-done house, and see my family in the disarray that seems to abound here. I mean the house should be clean, and my walls that need painted should be done, and my pictures hung....We haven't finished all the work this house needs. Now, if you are saying to yourself " what on earth Brigette!?! those are not the things that matter!" have no fear, because literally 30 seconds into my dramatic thoughts of despair over Elder Nelson coming to my house (which there is no chance of) the Lord blessed me with a light bulb moment.

So here I am in my crazy house with stuff strewn about, the kids in the other room playing and Joey running around half naked ( like always) And I know one thing. If Elder Nelson were to stop by here, it would be nice to have my house at least clean, but more importantly I hope He would see how much we love our children. I hope my children would be polite, not because the are scared that mom and dad will get after them if they aren't- But I hope they would be polite because they know of whom the man standing in their home is, and have some amount of respect for him. I hope Mike and I would have taken the time that day and the days before to say our prayers, read our scriptures, and all the others things we know we should do, so that when we shake the Hand of this Man of God we could feel good about ourselves, we could feel peace. I hope that we have treated our children and each other with the respect consistently enough that the spirit of God would dwell with in the walls of our home.
It took a few seconds but this day dreaming caused me to reflect on the most important things in life, it Caused me to pause and evaluate where we are as individuals and as a family, it gave me the nudge to make some changes long over due. I am not, nor will I probably ever be, perfect. But I know the things in life that matter most. They aren't the fresh coats of paint, cute decorations or shiny floors. The most important things in life are God, and my standing before him,as well as my families. The most important things I have live with in the walls of this home, whoa re they? am I teaching them the right things? the Most important things?. if those things are not in order then we are more lost then we realize. I pray as the Hellers Prepare to hear the words of a prophet, that we will have the courage to be better and follow his words.

The Deal-

there have been a few disputes about money around the house. Jack says its his, Olivia says its hers, and some how mom has no change in her purse anymore. But please do not let your heart be troubled because the kids have struck a deal and peace will abound from here on out. heres the deal according to Jack:

"If Olivia finds money, she puts it in her purse, If I find money I keep it and some times give it to her."

ME: " so you keep the money you find in your wallet and sometimes she is going to give you the money she finds?"

Jack: " no we keep all the money in her wallet and she doesn't have to give me anything she finds."


How does that girl do it??? she sells you some plan and you think you are getting a deal only to realize later she took everything and you got nothing. Shes a sales woman in the making!

how to kill a frog

This morning I find myself googling the topic " nicest way to kill a frog".

we have an invasion. two weeks ago Olivia and some friends went out to the pond to catch the "two" frogs we heard croking every night. These frogs are SO loud and she couldn't sleep at night. after an hour of hunting the kids came back with SEVEN frogs and thats just around our tiny gold fish pond. Olivia really wanted to put their little lives to an end, but my soft heart just couldn't -so we set them free. Well guess what? they are back and louder then ever! Not to mention they are out in our back yard around the pool. I can only imagine how many frogs think they should hang out in there. We have found them in our pool filter to! If we don't stop the invasion they could ruin the pool. Olivia is back to sleepless nights and I know there is NO WAY she will just let them go again, she was mad we let them go the first time.

So here I am. preparing for another Friday night...and googling " nicest way to kill a frog".

funny.

The Dog ate my garden. I spent hours and hours preparing the soil and planting, and she jumped the fence and ate the garden.

This resulted in an frustrated and angry Brigette.

The decision was made to run the dog every day and see if my early morning run with her would alleviate her destructive ways.

This brings us to today.

Olivia. " mom...are you going to waer THAT when you take me to school today?"

me- " yes, I had to take angie out this morning and I am doing yard work so it doesn't make sense to shower right now."

Olivia. " I guess its o.k. most moms where that to school anyway..."

who knew she even noticed my efforts to be ready for the day before dropping her off?